Power

    You know who I am. I'm a purposeless person with meaning to find. I peek through the blinds in the hope that I'll find some semblance of personage or humanity that I can take for my sake. I need to feel whole. Help me feel whole. Please. I promise I'll let you if you explain your intent. My trust issues get in the way, I know. The feelings that I hold are paradoxical, I know. How can I feel love and hatred for the same person? Scary thoughts of murder and suicide in my brain, sitting next to the concept of peace, I feel insane. I want to pick flowers and run through the daisies but the pressures I'm put through make me feel all hazy. Am I crazy? I would never cause pain but thoughts come and go of hurting you for hurting me. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind, so I've heard. But I'm half blind and you can see completely, how am I? How am I expected to be fine? I'm fine. I'm sorry for the thoughts I've put in your mind. I don't want to scare you so I'll leave my thoughts behind. They'll stay in a world that's impossible to burrow into and the harder you try the harder it gets. Why? I'm scared, that's why. Nobody held my hand as a child. I didn't learn how to manage emotions, understand? You didn't either, I understand. But you fail to understand that I understand that I still have the power to make some demands of myself. You do too, let's explore it together. I guess not, let's stay in because of the weather. It's easier to avoid than to stand up and decide that living less of a life is worse than living a full one. And now we have to decide what living a full life even means. To start, I guess it means to put your thoughts into the world with no bars to hold you in. That's the beginning of the discovery of your power.